Copine With Pet Loss

Each one of us is different. We all process loss in different ways. For some, it may only take a few days to come to grips with the loss of a beloved pet. For others, it can take years. This doesn’t make us any stronger or weaker than one another, and it is important to never doubt yourself through this trying period. The loss of a pet is hard enough, you don’t need to worsen it for yourself.

Our pets give us a sense of purpose. On our darkest days, they give us a reason to get out of bed. They are a continuous reminder of how beautiful life can be. Yes, they can be a little annoying every so often. You may trip over them or want to scream when you are cleaning up the third pee puddle of the day. Yet, the moment they are gone, you find yourself missing the little things you didn’t even realize they did.

It’s Okay To Cry!

Experiencing any kind of loss is overwhelming, yet the loss of a pet hits differently. You are allowed to cry. You are allowed to scream! Don’t feel ashamed of your feelings, and never try to bottle them up and forget them. It is so important to accept these emotions, and expressing them can relieve some of the pain you are feeling. Grieving is a long, exhausting, and difficult process and is often harder than being with your dog when they pass. Finding a strong, empathic support system is the only way to get through it.

Be Kind to Yourself

Don’t pressure yourself into moving on. There is no allotted time for grief, and the idea that you “should just get over it” is more damaging than mourning for a bit longer. Our pets provide us with so much more love and support than we realize. We set up routines in our lives to care for them and spend time with them. We come home to their excitement each day. Their permanent presence in our home means that there is never a time when we are actually alone. Losing a pet is not just losing a partner. It's losing their love, support, and your daily routine, and purpose. It is no surprise that it is so difficult to accept it.

The unexpected death of a pet can be particularly hard. The guilt of not being there when it happened and feeling as though you could have prevented it can be overwhelming. The constant “what ifs” are not healthy, but as hard as it is, you need to let go of that guilt.

If you feel this way, you shouldn’t try to take it on alone. If you have the opportunity to, speak to your veterinarian. They will be able to provide you with insight into what could and couldn’t have been done. Which is sometimes all you need to have some closure. Having a healthy support system in which you can express your feelings of guilt without fear of judgment is vital.

Moving On

You are not betraying your dog by moving on. Don’t ever feel guilty about it. The thought of forgetting about them completely is terrifying, but I can assure you that is simply not possible. Dogs have such a big impact on us and while we may forget small details here and there, we can never ever forget their presence. There are tons of ways to document the times you spent together and if you ever feel like their memory is slipping, you can go back and remind yourself.